Shining Forth Despite The Darkness

I wrote, a few weeks ago, asking Who Inspired You To Be You? showing how you can often trace your gifts and aspirations back to childhood. For me, it was the trauma of ill-health and an abusive marriage that initially lit up my life, leading to my becoming a bestselling author, followed by the love, kindness and help of others.

Back in the 1980s, when I was first published, it was the publishers who set up speaking engagements across the country, on radio and on TV. Being an introvert, this was not a status that was entirely comfortable for me. However, having always wanted to be an actress, whereby you take on another persona, I succeeded, and delivered the goods, sometimes as keynote speaker, before an audience of 1,500.

Some talks were on the process of writing, which resulted, eventually, in my leading writers' workshops. Others were inspirational addresses for the Salvation Army and other, similar conferences, while radio and TV interviews tended to be on the imparting of advice to listeners who were experiencing painful relationships.

Radio Scotland

As I said in my last post, this being before the days of the internet, readers of my books wrote letters of praise and thanks, via my publishers, from all over the world. By the mid-nineties, with word of my success having spread far and wide, I was receiving commissions from major publishers.

The first, from Hodder, was the story of a young woman who lived in my vicinity, and who had suffered a life-changing condition, which left her extremely disabled. Following years of trauma, she eventually found faith, and was Healed Within. I confess it wasn't always easy. The lady in question wanted me to include a good deal of information which wasn't relevant to the theme. I'll be writing more about that later.

If that was hard, my next commission was more so. The story of a young scientist, who was a haemophiliac, it was utterly heartbreaking.

'I can't do it,' I told the publishers.

'Please!' they insisted. 'At least read the notes his widow has made.'

And so I did. Phil was one of many who received contaminated bloods, and became HIV+, eventually dying of AIDS. With an inner urging, I accepted the proposal.

Hodder then sent me out to Geneva to research the story. Met at the airport by his widow and little daughter, I was told:

'My Daddy can walk now, 'cos he's up there.' Pointing upward, the little girl indicated heaven.

The book, titled The Last Mountain: Living With AIDS, was published in the mid-nineties and, in no time, became a Sunday Times No 4 Bestseller.

Needless to say, my talks, conferences and interviews increased rapidly. At one of them, a major event, I was introduced to the audience by Edward England, editor at Hodder & Stoughton, as 'a bestselling author.'

'No!' I protested, blushing furiously. 'I'm not a bestselling author. The book is a bestseller.'

Accompanied by Rev David Coffey, who happened to be my minister at the time, I was duly rebuked.

'Don't hide your light,' David admonished me. 'It's not yours to hide.'

Realising that he was quoting Matthew Chapter 5:14-16 which cites God as the light of the world, and goes on to say 'let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.' I learned my lesson!  It is not ME that I'm promoting.  Nor am I seeking attention.  It's is the light that God has set within me - within all of us - which we could, and should, shine forth.  Especially now, in these dark times.

That is not to say that I found it easy. Having been brought up with a painful but undiagnosed intestinal disease, my mother had been told to ignore my cries, because I was a 'naughty, attention-seeking child'. The mantra 'children should be seen and not heard' was, therefore, a huge influence in my life.

Nevertheless, God continues to tell me not to hide my light under a bushel, because it is not mine to hide. Hence my appeal to you to shine your light into the world. No matter the darkness you find in your life, as we all do, we are to illuminate this dark world with love, peace, patience, and kindness. So I'd love to hear of your experience in this respect.